Easiest, Softest Way

Hi,
I'm [Anonymous], compulsive overeater.  I weigh and measure my food from the greysheet three times a day, call it into my sponsor, and don't eat no matter what. I recently celebrated 7 years of back to back abstinence.  My life now, does not resemble my life before at all.  I am grateful that I tried all of the "diets" out there before I crawled into greysheet, because now I don't wonder if anything else would work for me.  Everything worked temporarily.  Greysheet is the only program that gives me freedom from compulsive eating, allows me to LOVE my meals, and teaches me boundaries and self-care on a level I never knew. I have had to weigh my food in some very uncomfortable situations.  The uncomfortable situations took moments, not weighing my food would have taken my life.  

Sometimes it's awkward to have to walk into an unfamiliar setting carrying a scale and back-up, but not as awkward as walking in carrying 100 extra pounds. The time I put into maintaining my abstinence is a drop in the bucket compared to what I put into the perfect binge, or whether I had been "good" or "bad", whether the people in the room had seen me go up to the buffet already, wondering if I was really as heavy as I looked in pictures........it never stopped. I was preoccupied in the first days of abstinence with how I could possibly get through a birthday with no "x", or never have another bite of "y".  My first sponsor asked me if I could not have any "x" for today, of course I could get through today......it was the rest of my life I was worried about.  Then I got it.  For the first time in program I truly understood, "One Day At A Time." What a relief I felt.  The "rest of my life" was only a sequence of days.  I could only deal with today.  I could do anything for one day. So, I'm grateful.  Grateful for the back to back days that have accumulated.  It got easier.  It really did.  If it wouldn't have, I wouldn't still be here.  The cravings went away.  The withdrawals went away.  My higher power definately gave me a new life.  Miracles happen. One Day At A Time,
NMW,
Anonymous in MA